Chapter 1
Person-centred language. Always start by asking people how they wish to be described. Some prefer identity-first wording (for example, “autistic person”), while others prefer person-first wording (“person with autism”). Following their preference shows respect and supports their sense of agency.
Pronoun and name respect. Do not guess someone’s gender or pronouns. Instead, ask politely and then use the pronouns and name they give you every time. Getting this right fosters safety, trust, and inclusion; getting it wrong can cause hurt and disengagement.
Avoiding harmful terminology. Make sure no one on the team uses outdated, medicalising, or dismissive terms. Language that frames neurodivergence or gender diversity as a disorder or problem is both inaccurate and damaging. Use current, respectful words that people use for themselves and encourage colleagues to correct mistakes promptly and learn from them.
Scenario:
Jordan, a transgender autistic man, corrects a support worker who keeps calling him by his birth name. Instead of saying, "But that’s what it says in our system," an affirming provider will update records and apologise for the mistake.
